This is the story of a man named Stanley.
Stanley worked for a company in a big building where he was Employee #427.
Employee #427's job was simple: he sat at his desk in Room 427 and he pushed buttons on a keyboard.
Orders came to him through a monitor on his desk telling him what buttons to push, how long to push them, and in what order.
This is what Employee #427 did every day of every month of every year, and although others may have considered it soul rending,
Stanley relished every moment that the orders came in, as though he had been made exactly for this job.
And Stanley was happy.
And then one day, something very peculiar happened.
Something that would forever change Stanley;
Something he would never quite forget.
He had been at his desk for nearly an hour when he had realized not one single order had arrived on the monitor for him to follow.
No one had shown up to give him instructions, call a meeting, or even say 'hi'. Never in all his years at the company had this happened, this complete isolation.
Something was very clearly wrong. Shocked, frozen solid, Stanley found himself unable to move for the longest time.
But as he came to his wits and regained his senses, he got up from his desk and stepped out of his office.
When Stanley came to a set of 2 open doors, he entered the door on his left.
[[Left]]
[[Right]]Yet there was not a single person here either.
Feeling a wave of disbelief, Stanley decided to go up to his boss's office, hoping he might find an answer there.
[[Stairs]]
[[Broom Closet]]Ah, yes, truly a room worth admiring.
It had really been worth the detour after all, just to spend a few moments here in this immaculate, beautifully constructed room.
Stanley simply stood here, drinking it all in.
Yeeesss, really, really worth it being here in the room.
A room so utterly captivating that even though all your co-workers have mysteriously vanished, here you sit looking at these chairs and some paintings.
Really worth it.
(link:"Wait for a few more seconds")[At this point, Stanley's obsession with this room bordered on creepy, and reflected poorly on his overall personality.
It's possible that this is why everyone left.
]
[[Leave Room]]Coming to a staircase, Stanley walked upstairs to his boss's office.
[[Up]]
[[Down]]Stepping into his manager's office, Stanley was once again stunned to discover not an indication of any human life.
Shocked, unraveled, Stanley wondered in disbelief who orchestrated this, what dark secret was being held from him!
What he could not have known was that the keypad behind the boss's desk guarded the terrible truth that his boss had been keeping from him.
And so the boss had assigned it an extra secret PIN number.
2-8-4-5
But of course, Stanley couldn't possibly have known this.
[[2845]]Yet incredibly, by simply pushing random buttons on the keypad, Stanley happened to input the correct code by sheer luck.
Amazing.
He stepped into the newly opened passageway.
[[Elevator]]But at last, he had enough of the amazing room, and so he took the first open door on his left to get back to business.
(link-goto:"Left","Maintenance")
[[Ahead]]Descending deeper into the building, Stanley realized he felt a bit peculiar.
It was a stirring of emotion in his chest, as though he felt more free to think for himself, to question the nature of his job.
Why did he feel this now, when for years it had never occurred to him?
This question would not go unanswered for long.
[[Mind Control Facility]]Stanley walked straight ahead through the large door that read 'Mind Control Facility'.
(link-goto:"Ahead","Ahead2")
[[Escape Hallway]]Although this passageway had the word 'escape' written on it, the truth was that at the end of this hall, Stanley would meet his violent death.
The door behind him was not shut. Stanley still had every opportunity to turn around and get back on track.
At this point, Stanley was making a conscious, concerted effort to walk forward, and willingly confront his death.
[[Turn Around]]
[[Continue]]But of course, Stanley thought better of it, and realized he simply had too much to live for.
(link-goto:"Ahead","Ahead2")As the machine whirled into motion, and Stanley was inched closer and closer to his demise, he reflected that his life had been of no consequence whatsoever.
Stanley can't see the bigger picture. He doesn't know the real story. Trapped forever in his narrow vision of what this world is.
Perhaps his death was of no great loss, like plucking the eyeballs from a blind man.
And so he resigned, and willingly accepted this violent end to his brief and shallow life. Farewell, Stanley.
[[sv_cheats 1]]*Stanley is taken to a room with a table in the middle of it*
Stanley, this is me being serious.
In fact, this is my serious room. It's where I come to be serious.
That table is the most serious table I could find. I looked at many, many tables. Hundreds of tables!
It's possible I looked at over a thousand tables, I honestly don't know.
The specific number isn't as important as the understanding that of all the tables that I looked at, this one is the most serious.
I relate this story to impress upon you, the extent to which this is the most serious room I have, which is why I brought you here.
You just tried to activate server cheats, which, of course, runs the risk of breaking the entire game.
You've got no respect for the strict order of scripted narrative events and I just can't have that.
It's time to get serious, Stanley. No jokes, no games.
Outside of this room, I might be more tolerant of those things, but now we're in the room.
Which is why I'm subjecting you to the most serious punishment I can think of: one hundred million-billion-trillion years, standing here in the serious room.
Perhaps after that, we can talk about the severity of your actions, and whether you've learned anything.
But, until then, serious room, GO.
And so he detoured through the maintenance section, walked straight ahead to the opposite door, and got back on track.
(link-goto:"Ahead","Left")
[[Lift]]But Stanley didn't want to go back to the office, he wanted to wander about and get even further off track. So now in order to go back, he needed to go, um...uh...hm hm hm hm, from here it's...um...left.
(link:"Left")[Oh, no. No, it's to the right, my mistake.
(link:"Right")[No! No, no, no! Not the right! Why would I have ever said it was to the right? What was I thinking?
It's clearly...oh dear, would you hold on for a minute, please? *papers rustling* Now, let's see...
we went, um, right...left...down...left...right...
Ah yep! Okay, okay, yes! I've got it now! This story is absolutely, definitely, this way.
(link-goto:"Ahead","Confusion1")]]NO! No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no! This isn't right at all! You're not supposed to be here, yet! This is all a spoiler! Quick, Stanley, close your eyes!
Okay, okay, okay, okay, we just...we just have to get back to, um... oh...
Who am I kidding? It's all rubbish now. The whole story...completely unusable.
How about rather than waste my time trying to salvage this nonsense, we'll just restart the game from the beginning. And this time, suppose we don't wander so far off-track, hm?
Okay, from the top!
(link-goto:"Restart","Confusion2")When Stanley- wait...wait, what?
No, I...no, I restarted! I swear I definitely restarted the game over, completely fresh, everything should be...
Or did something change? Stanley, did you change anything when we were back in that room with all the monitors? Did you move the story somewhere, or...
Hold on, why am I asking you? I'm the one who wrote the story. It was right here a minute ago. I know for sure that it's here somewhere.
Okay, then, it's an adventure! Come, Stanley, let's find the story!
(link:"Aimlessly Wander")[I'll say it: This is the worst adventure I've ever been on.
I can promise you, there definitely was a story here before. Do we just...do we need to restart the game again? Well, I find it unlikely that we'll ever progress by starting over and over again...
But it's got to be better than this. Okay, let's give it a shot, why not.
(link-goto:"Restart","Confusion3")]Okay, yep, it's worse. I might be remembering this wrong. It's possible the story is back where we just came from.
Why don't we go back the other direction and see if we missed anything?
*door behind Stanley opens*
(link:"Enter Door")[*the first room of the office has turned into a blue hallway.*
Aha! I knew we'd missed something! The story! Here it comes!
(link:"Continue")[*Stanley reaches a dead end*
No, wait, nevermind, not the story! Okay, let's head back the other way and retrace our steps.
(link:"Retrace Steps")[*the office hallways become another place, with wooden walls, ceiling, and floor, and clutter everywhere*
Now this...well I'll be honest, I don't recognize this place at all. Is this the story?
I don't think so. I can't quite recall, but I believe my story took place in an office building...is that correct? Hm...do you remember, Stanley?
Well, you know what, since I've completely forgotten what we were supposed to be doing, how about this:
You win!
*children cheer*
Congratulations! I know you put in a lot of hard work, and it really paid off, so, good job!
Oh, no. No. I don't feel right about this at all. We both know you didn't put in any actual work for that win. Some people win fair and square and this was not one of those situations.
Okay, I'm getting weirded out by whatever this place is. I don't care what might happen this time, I have to restart.
(link-goto:"Restart","Confusion4")
]]]